splat_timfandomcom-20200215-history
Splat Tim (game)
'Splat Tim '''is the first game in the ''Splat Tim series, developed by Preet Design and published by whatever the hell that N in the orange box means (Captain N? Sure, let's go with that) on March 15, 2017 for all regions. The game chronicles Splat Tim's adventure through the ruins of the Inkocalypse on his quest to make the world better. Splat Tim ''was directed and created by Hideo Kojima, most famous for making the hit video game series ''It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Splat Tim is well known for saying "He does it!" Plot Splat Tim wakes up one morning in Inkopolis to find that the entire thing is destroyed and that he is now sleeping on a pile of rubble. He gets up, but something doesn't feel right about him. He tries to go for a swim in the nearby pool of ink (there's plenty of them).He has become one of the mutant deformed "Splat People". Tim wanders around, looking for help, and he finds help in the form of Cap'n Cuttlefish and the Squid Sisters. The three take him to Outer Heaven, an artificial floating island build out of Octarian technology and the last beacon of guaranteed safety. Splat Tim is assigned to scavenging duties.When all of a sudden he is attacked by a bandit Inkling. He shoots it out of fear and kills her instantly. Suddenly, an alarm goes off, and they see a strange yellow man running off with the Squid Sisters in tow. Tim and Cuttlefish give chase, but he is simply too fast for them. A message comes on Cuttlefish's radio announcing that the yellow man has his granddaughters and unless he is paid in "a bazillion coins!" they will suffer a most dreadful fate: Deviantart. Tim recognizes the voice as Wario and runs off on an adventure through the wasteland. Eventually, Tim comes across the Chateau de Wario, his final stop on his journey. After engaging Wario in a fight, Tim comes out victorious and frees the Squid Sisters, who thank him with a special concert just for him back at Outer Heaven. Cuttlefish awards Tim a medal recognizing him for his service. Gameplay Splat Tim is a third-person shooter. In the game, you control Tim as he ventures through the wasteland. All of the missions, save for the first and last, are non-linear and have multiple ways of reaching the goal of the level. After the first mission, Tim acquires the desert eagle, his first weapon. Tim can upgrade his weapons back at Outer Heaven using Power Eggs or have entirely new ones fabricated.If his weapons runs out of ammo,he has to collect more from enemies.Tim can jump, double jump, roll, or duck in order to evade enemy attacks. Tim also has a slowly-recharging health meter that can be extended or "armored" to reduce incoming damage using Power Eggs. Every "mission set" is capped off with a boss fight against one of Wario's lackeys, but mini-bosses can be found either roaming the wasteland or as the objective of a mission. He does it! Weapons SMGs * Skorpyon * Glock Assault rifles * M16 carbine * AK-47 Sniper rifles * M1R carbine Pistols * Desert eagle * Cake gun Shotguns * Winchester 1887 Heavy weapons * M2 flamethrower Development Not much is known about the development history for Splat Tim except that Hideo Kojima was drunk one morning at work back in his Konami days and misheard "Splatoon" as "Splat Tim", thus giving the original idea for the game. He then proceeded to take the rights to Splatoon from Nintendo, who was willing to part with it if it meant a genius like Kojima was going to make games with it. The rest is a mystery. Reception As mentioned above in the game infobox, Splat Tim recieved positive reviews and is currently sitting at an 80% on Metacritic and an 82% on GameRankings. Most game outlets praised it for its fun and fast gameplay and music decisions, but criticized the graphics for being "not brown enough" and wanted the story to be expanded on. IGN gave it a 3/10 because the reviewer couldn't understand how a gun works. Unrelatedly, said journalist was found dead in his chair the next morning, having died from dehydration after "having masturbated to anime girls for the last 17 hours".however the centrist propaganda things are ignored. Trivia *Konami tried to sue Preet Design because a pile of wreckage formed a middle finger facing the Konami logo. They lost and had to cancel Metal Gear Solid VI: Sons of Pachinko in order to recoup their losses. *The game's content would actually warrant an M for Mature rating, due to the graphic violence, weapons, rude language, and some sexual themes. However, Preet design decided to release a censored version with the 10+ rating *The official release tonned down as the scenes said below *This is the first and only game where Splat Tim eats somebody's butt in a literal fashion, as Splat Tim can be seen eating one of the bosses' butts after killing them. *Gooeh is an Npc in this game, and when talked to, will share his hatred for communists while pissing on a Soviet flag behind him. *If you stand behind a particular bush long enough, you will get a cutscene where Cap'n Cuttlefish stabs himself in the balls. *If you stay in outer heaven for 24 hours, you will gain a digital copy of the anime "Godzilla the series" *Cake gun was added by me when Kojima was off Category:Games Category:Main Series Category:Games with sex jokes